When and If

when i say you are all i think about,
i mean you are the only thing my mind will allow itself to be consumed by.

and when i tell myself i am going to find a way to move on,
i mean i am going to desperately search for anyone with something to offer,
in order to occupy this emptiness created by your absence.

(even though i am fully aware no one can make me feel as happy and alive,
and happy to be alive, as you.)

and if i ever say i do not love you anymore,
i mean i have decided to pretend i love you less.

(because not loving the love of your life will always be impossible.)

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About ginapeluso

Sometimes I live in Baltimore, other times in Boston. Sylvia Plath is my guru and Tennyson's Ulysses is my sacred text.
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